It’s another week in our “Hello, my name is…” series. Today, say hello to Mary Deal!
Hello, my name is Mary…
Name: Mary Parke Flanagan Deal
Birthday: January 1st (My dad still bugs me about the money I owe him for the tax break he missed the year before!)
Relationship Status: Married to Ty for 7 amazing years!
Occupation: Part time labor and delivery nurse, full time stepmother to William (13) and mother to Parke (5) and Gentry (3). I’m working on adding personal running coach to this resume as well!
Hobbies: RUNNING, binge watching Netflix with my husband, drinking Starbucks coffee, and shopping at Target
One interesting fact about me: I love tattoos! I only have three but I think they are the most fascinating pieces of art!
Hello fellow mommas!
I hope y’all enjoyed the little bio above. I figured there’s no better way to get to know someone than through a fake Facebook profile! 😉
So I have been so excited about writing this for the blog! Like most people, I really like talking about myself, but I also love telling others what God has done in my life. For a couple weeks, I sat and thought about what I wanted to say about being a mom.
Then one day in the shower I thought, “what have I learned about being a step-mom?”
I stopped and thought for a while about this. Because if I’m honest I still feel like I’m figuring this role out.
Then God gave me one word… Surrender.
I don’t know if you are like me, but I really like to be in control of what’s going on around me. When I feel out of control, I kind of start to go crazy. It may not be something you see externally, but internally I am going nuts!!
Well, becoming a step-mom has probably been the most out-of-control I have ever felt! You’re supposed to help raise this child, but at the same time the real decisions come from the biological parents.
Sometimes it’s really hard knowing when to step in and when to be quiet.
And I definitely have learned this the hard way! After months of trying to control what was going on with my stepson, I soon realized I had to give it to God. He is ultimately the One in control and He knew what was really the best for my stepson anyways. I’ve had to practice this over and over.
Back to the day in the shower…
As I was still thinking about this surrender thing, I realized this was also what I had learned the most being a biological momma. Being pregnant was one of the scariest times of my life! As a labor and delivery nurse, I’ve seen it all and it was so hard not to let my mind go to a bad place. I had to constantly remind myself to give my pregnancies and babies to the Lord, otherwise I would have gone crazy!
During my first pregnancy, I went in for a normal visit and got an ultrasound for fetal weight at 36 weeks. At this visit we found out that my daughter had stopped growing, was measuring very small and I barely had any amniotic fluid. My doctor put me on bedrest to see if we could get her a little further along. Those were the longest six days of my life!! During those days of sitting around at the house, my mind would wander to worst-case scenarios and to the worst situations I had seen.
I finally grabbed my Bible and just read. I started reading the Psalms and one verse spoke to me in particular. Psalms 62:8 says,
Trust in Him at all times, o people; pour out your hearts to Him for God is our refuge.
So those days I had to decide to put my hope and trust in God and know my daughter was ultimately His. Thankfully everything ended up going well and she is now one of the tallest kids in her class!
So as a mom I’ve never felt so out of control or helpless, but I think that’s ok.
I think that’s one reason He allows us to be mommies, so we have to run to Him and we have to surrender to Him.
It’s put life in a whole new perspective for me and I love it!! It’s hard but I’ve got the most amazing Being watching over me and my children!